The American Idol Debut

November 27, 2008 | Published in | 0 comments

David Cook's new album (creatively called 'David Cook' in true manufactured pop style) is thoroughly dissatisfactory. It was akin to expecting margarine to taste like butter - but in truth, it still tastes like margarine. My ears are upset. I expected more from this man! What happened lah. I think he dated that skank and as a result, his musical abilities just went down the drain. His old album ('Analog Heart' - released before he got famous) is ten times better than this trashtastic trainwreck of an album. Guitar riffs do not always make songs sound good! Yes, it may seem sexy at first, but too much of it is a no-no. Why did us bimbotic fangirls expect so much of you, Mr Cook? Why can't we hear any more "Always Be My Baby"-type renditions? I played that song not less than 180 times (I have proof on my iTunes play count. Holy crap - it's 209!!!!) during exam season. WHY, MR COOK, WHY?! There is more variation in a box of sand than on your album. Dear, oh dear, as my old PE teacher would say. Every song sounds like "Light On" with the exception of a gut-wrenching "Permanent". There is nothing repeat-worthy on your album except this song. Now, "Permanent" is the kind of shit I want to hear from you, Mr Cook. Emo piano? Check. Surly romantic lyrics? Check. The resonant deep throated voice? Check. Will-make-girls-scream-uncontrollably-at-gig factor? Check. Now if only the other 13 tracks made me feel.

Is this the moment where I look you in the eye?
Forgive my broken promise that you'll never see me cry
And everything, it will surely change even if I tell you I won't go away today
Will you think that you're all alone
When no one's there to hold your hand?
And all you know seems so far away and everything is temporary
Rest your head

I'm permanent

And what's with the eyeliner on your CD cover? Or was that photoshopped in to make you appeal to the My Chemical Romance crowd? Anyway, I'm too soft-hearted. I'm going to forgive this man for producing a bad first album. There's always a bad first album for everyone, with the exception of Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera perhaps.

David Archuleta (who has put on a bit of weight, incidentally) is a different story altogether. I never liked his sweet dulcet voice, but ... oh dear, I never thought I'd say this but his teenybopper "Hey, girl, I'm gonna getcha" tunes are quite addictive. Maybe it's a good thing he lost in the end because at this rate, he's going to be so much more famous than Mr Cook. I could just be thirteen in terms of musical taste, but whatever. I couldn't stop listening to "Crush" when it was first released; it is such a Water Fountain Romance song that will either make you smile or die a little inside from remembering the good ol' simple days. Sure, his songs have simple melodic beats that don't require very much talent to produce, but it's fine. To be honest, this album sounds a bit like Clay Aiken's first album which was irreprehensibly melodic and poppy in all its gayness.

Whatever it is, I don't think either of these albums have very much staying power. Sucks to be in the music industry these days!

Yay for Beyonce's 'Single Ladies'. Now that is catchy.

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