October 05, 2009 | Published in | 0 comments

Lest I came off as a manipulative, gold digging spawn of the devil in my previous post, I shall say the following: I cannot and may never be able to capture the essence of everything that he has ever done for me, when I have comparatively done none for him. I am flawed, trivial and sometimes downright callous. I am not a different person when I am around him. Scratch that, I am; he makes me a better person, trite as that may sound. They had forgiven each other the things they were ashamed of in the past, they forgave everything in the present, and they felt that this love of theirs had changed them both. He knows that I am a cantankerous sort, the type of girl who will stop at nothing to get what she wants, the type who will cry wolf shamelessly and incessantly, but still he persisted and insisted for 8 months when I did nothing but treat him like I would any other friend, sometimes more cruelly out of this odd need to spite those who wish to come close to me.

No, I do not reciprocate out of sympathy or pity, but out of pure - dare I say it - love. We knew we were going abroad, the both of us, but we sought comfort in the fact that we would at least be in the same country - just 3000 miles apart. A year ago, I wouldn't ever had even thought of being in the situation that I am in now. The thought of long distance would stir convulsive emotions in most people, but I don't mind. Not at all. Dare I think of the future? For once, yes. Isn't that the cornerstone of any functional relationship; the ability to think ahead without throwing up?

Everyday, I go about doing my business, attending classes, but always my brain is geared 3 hours ahead, and I wonder what he is doing. 5 minutes later, my phone vibrates and hey whaddya know: he's studying again.

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