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So I woke up at 7.45AM yesterday, feeling slightly lazy and totally indifferent about this 10k I was about to run. I really was not expecting too much of my personal timing; I just wanted to go and have a decent morning jog that would hopefully burn off some post-exam fat.




Although the route was quite pretty, I didn't really pay attention. I was bopping to the tunes of Metallica and Lady GaGa most of the way. I find that mouthing lyrics really does wonders for the motivation levels.

I was also horrified at the fact that an old man of about 60 managed to overtake me. I like to think that this happens to the best of us.

The weather was quite dismal and far, far too windy. Fecking British weather. I found myself running against the wind most of the time - probably the only time when I will ever know what it feels like to be 'blown away by the wind', a comment that only thin people receive.


I love it when people dress up to run. As if it doesn't chafe enough running in proper gear! This is Darth Vader running with a bucket and lightsaber. Let's see him run with an actual sized lifesaber. I'd like to watch him flail about mercilessly as he tries to defy his own centre of gravity. FYI, an actual sized lightsaber is a blue fluorescent tube light with an all too cool handle attached to it. I have one of these babies lying around at home. It cost my father RM600.

Also, there was a toilet, Fred and Wilma Flintstone, a chicken and an egg somewhere among the mass of runners. There were also the usual aunties who walked the entire way and had 10 km's worth of idle conversation.




This was quite unexpected because I feel as though I weigh enough for 1 and a 1/2 girls (which is actually true, come to think of it...)

But fuck that lah. I topped up my burnt calories after with a Victorian sponge cake and a full English breakfast. Tee hee.



If I were in KL, it'd definitely have been char kway teow and kopi peng :)

Anyway, it's not about the timing so much as the raising funds for sick children!

SO!

PLEASE! If you're reading this, sponsor me? Every little bit helps! So far I have appx £350. Although this exceeds the minimum amount, the 'kiasu' soul in me cries for more to help these poor kids. Again, the website is here - runleukaemia.org.

Send me an email at whitestripedumbrella@gmail.com with your name, address and amount you'd like to donate!!

Today was a wonderfully sunny day. Managed to picnic in the park with a bag full of goodies from Whole Foods. Didn't have my camera on me so no photos there. Wore my polka dotted blazer and tiny short skirt everywhere. Bit of a mistake wearing it to the park.

Some updates IRL:

1) BRITNEY TICKETS ARE HERE!




I know it's a far cry from Metallica and the stuff I usually listen to, but the 12-year-old in me would die a little if I didn't see a fat crazy Britney lip sync to "Baby One More Time" and "Toxic" before I graduate.

2) Outlet Shopping

Bicester Village called my name. Well, not really. I was bored. So we headed up to Bicester Village at a steep, steep price of £45 for a train ticket because it was a fucking Saturday (didn't know they changed prices on Saturday!!) and shopped a bit. I still heart Portobello Rd, Topshop and American Apparel more any day.

Although!


I am in LOVE with this meat cleaver type necklace I managed to procure from All Saints. When worn as a choker, I'm a Cleopatra-type wannabe from 2009. Or, if sharpened, can be used as a lethal Batman-type weapon.



And this Luella shirt. I managed to look - for lack of a better word - dignified in this shirt. And since my wardrobe lacks dignity, I decided I'd get it. Knowing me, however, I'll probably end up making it look like a hobo's white shirt in no time.

3) 10km charity run



London 10km tomorrow. I don't know how I'm going to run in my state of extreme unfit-ness. Any sponsors? It's for Children with Leukaemia. OH WELL. It's for a good cause! :) Besides, the jerseys are too cute. Photos soon.

REAL FOX I FOUND IN A HUNGARIAN FLEA MARKET! £40 ONLY! WOMAN SAID TO ME “VERY NICE!!!” and WRAPPED IT AROUND HER NECK. HAHAHA. WHAT PETA WOULD DO TO HER! BUT MY GOD, THE FUR IS SOOOOO SOFT! Oh, don't I sound like the woman who skins dalmatian fur for fun!

Probably one of the most awesome chocolate cakes evah to cross my path. Strangely enough this was at the New York Cafe, where many many intellectuals have dined and exchanged ideas over a cup of coffee and a cake or two. I think Stalin may have dined here during his reign. I can't remember who else; it was written on the table mat but post-exam syndrome didn't allow me to take in very much.

My most awesome ring I discovered at yet another Hungarian flea market. Does it not look EDIBLE? Yum yum. I have a cupcake one too!

Ah. The bane of my existence. The Hungarian version of 'char kway' - langoush. Just fried dough smothered in sour cream and then totally snowed with smoked cheese. Probably has about 28478 calories but worth every mouthful. This piece of heaven totally redefined having an orgy in the mouth.

So this was in Paris. Probably the only interesting photo I have from my Parisian travels. It's the Hugo Boss display on Champs Elysees which I thought was beyond words because of the stuffed wolf and rabbit - which they'd totally never allow in London. God bless Europe.

Memento Park statue. This is where they house all the statues from the communist dictatorship era - in a barren park far, far away from the city center that required a bus ride through a kampung and a tram ride through the city. Note at the size of the worker's chest.

A traditional Hungarian sweetbread (the name of which I cannot spell but it starts with a 'kos') we found at a fete outside the National museum. It was weirdly addictive despite its coldness. It's just bread covered in sugar - like a sugar doughnut minus the oil.

Ok more later. Gotta dash to college.

Back in Londontown from Budapest & Paris. Took at least 500 photos of food and scenery! Found insane shoes and jewellery and a wicked size 16 oversized vest from god knows when in a Hungarian flea market! Communist memorabilia! Hence, hhotos soon. Am so fat it's not even funny anymore. Good night.

these days, it sort of pains me to realize that my writing in any form whatsoever is inherently limited to incoherent sentences about subjects i'll never understand - "the undoped setback layer reduces coulombic scattering from the quantum well", "the negative eigenvalues --> stability", "there is only one channel in this device".

the list goes on.

you know what? i'm not sure if i really care if whether a field effect transistor has one channel or eight. the more i'm weighed down by my inability to form pseudo-scientific disjointed sentences i want to pass off as answers, the more i want to just shut my brain off and indulge in my sartorial visions for this summer.

either that, or just sleep. i slept 10 hours last night and DAMN does it feel good, so much so that i can even compute matrices and eigenvalues this morning.

- Doused my camera in water owing to major spillage in bag right before exam.
- Hence, need new camera. Preferably something awesomez and mayjah like an SLR because I want to be able to take pretty photos! It can't hurt to take up a new hobby over the summer :) A Pentax KD100, maybe? Suggestions, thoughts for a beginner SLR-goer? We shall see. I think this is the headache talking. The children yelling outside are NOT helping!

So I've been sitting on my fucking ass all day attempting to study. That's how it's been for the past 4 weeks or so. Last night I was feeling particularly bored and in a really random moment of truth, I bent down to look under the table for my murderous Birks when suddenly I felt a tremulous jiggle of waves undulating across my stomach. Wtf.

I read Perezhilton.com on a daily - if not hourly basis (the shame, I know) - and while he is often quite funny, I think he's seriously starting to become a whiny bitch re: the Gaygate at Miss USA 2009. Perez has been going on and on and ON about how Miss California responded to his question.

Perez Hilton: “Vermont recently became the 4th state to legalize same-sex marriage. Do you think every state should follow suit? Why or why not?”

Carrie Prejean: “Well, I think it’s great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage. And you know what, in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offence to anybody out there, but that’s how I was raised and that’s how I think it should be between a man and a woman. Thank you very much.”

I have to admit, that answer really did her no good. She drew all sorts of boos from the crowd although it was cut out on TV (haha!). AND the fact that she's from California! Whether she likes it or not, America will always be made up of gays, lesbians and transgenders. People like Perez can destroy you if he so wishes. She shouldn't go around saying things like that because people are going to hit her for openly discriminating against gays and lesbians. And wtf just because you're going to be crowned Miss USA doesn't give you the right to say 'my country'. Gee. It ain't the crown for fucking Queen of the World.

While I am totally on the boat for same sex marriage (hell I'm up for marriage with anything, just so long as it's not an inanimate object), Perez has been consistently blogging about other people's viewpoints on gay marriage post-Miss USA, people like Miley Cyrus and Heidi Montag. Seriously? Miley Cyrus and Heidi Montag? They're probably the two people who matter the least on this planet. I've always wanted to trip Miley Cyrus up because she and her Juicy Couture tracksuit just scream "I'm a sixteen-year-old with large pouty lips that are clean from not giving my ripped 21-year-old boyfriend any BJs! I'm so innocent! Bully me now!!!"

I digressed.

It would seem that he's more angry at the fact that she's against gay marriage more so than the way she answered it, although he claims that she's allowed to have her own opinions. Some people have lauded her courage in expressing her honest opinions, while others have totally condemned her for saying "marriage should ONLY be between a man and a woman". I think the part that probably hurt the most is the fact that she repeated that sentence more than once - implying quite explicitly that if you're gay you're basically not worthy of loving anyone and being able to sanctify that bond. If I were in Perez's shoes, I'd have thrown a hissy fit right away. But please la, Perez, don't bring Heidi Montag and Miley Cyrus into it. Go on fighting for gay rights, but don't drag Z-list people who only pretend to care about the LGBT society into it.

However, the fact that she can say all that and have a 10,000 watt smile on her face at the same time totally amazed me. Most beauty pageant contestants are trained to have smiles plastered on their faces 24/7. It's pretty tragic how people subject themselves to such pain, but the masochist in us needs indulging every now and then. She said she went home after and ate a burger for the first time in a long time. Sucks to be a pretty girl! I personally have never agreed with the concept of beauty pageants and I haven't sat down to watch any beauty pageant since I was about 10, but it makes good blog fodder and inspiration for books such as 'Carrie'.



The concept of free speech can be pretty confusing. It would seem that these days that by free speech we mean throw out the narrow-minded and ONLY allow the open-minded opinions to flow when technically we should be allowed to say whatever the fuck we want without being condemned. Judging others - it's an inherent flaw in all of us.

A couple of my friends have said "I WILL kill you if you dye your hair blonde". Fair enough. Us Oriental types look like shit with blonde hair, anyway. 

I could never fully comprehend how British people always went on and on about the shitty weather until I came here. Back home it was always "MAN why is it so hot?" or "MAN why is the rain so heavy?!" And then here, it goes "omgomg it's sunny out! We HAVE to go out!" One notices the how heavily the weather influences one's mood. Er, whatsitcalled...oh ya Seasonal Affective Disorder. No wonder Malaysians are so relaksed compared to the Brits and New Yorkers.

Doesn't explain me, though.

I stumbled upon style rookie. Turns out she's a fashion blogger who's only 12. Hurray for adults stuck in children's bodies!

So when I was 12, I used to be called 'mature', 'wise beyond her years' etc. Apparently my English essays were pretty insightful, cogent...at times verbose. (Oh, Oxford thesaurus, how I miss you) I wasn't the type of kid to climb trees or go around playing in the mud. I stayed indoors most days and watched TV and ate my poor dial up connection going online to devour fan fiction. During the summer holidays, I would stay awake until six am writing poorly constructed stories of diaphanous elfin characters and their beautiful stories of life and love in a parallel universe. Now I stay awake until six attempting to memorise equations I know I'll only need for a couple of hours in a few weeks.

I remember playing around in the rain one day after school with a couple of friends. We were soaked through and we stuffed our faces with McDonald's after. I got the scolding of my life from my grandfather when I got home, but it was okay. It felt good; I couldn't stop smiling for days. That's probably the happiest feeling I can glean from my mid secondary school years.

I was a reserved child, one who didn't say much. And when I did, it was probably something sensible and well thought-out. I couldn't ever explain Pythagoras' Theorem though. I still can't. I was permanently pissed off because I never made it to the top maths group. I guess that should've been a telltale sign that I should never have done engineering as a major. No point crying over spilled milk, huh.

Anyway, in 2002 I discovered Linkin Park and Limp Bizkit. Nu-metal rock or whatever that genre was called (does it still exist??). So began my liberation phase. I remember that LP concert distinctly. I was wearing a tank top (first time EVER, I think. Was and always have been afraid to put my disturbingly large arms on display) and some really baggy cargo pants which were ALLL the rage back then. I remember headbanging and acting like a crazy bitch and freaking quite a lot of people out, as I am wont to do these days. It was pretty awesome. The next day, everything went back to the status quo. I was my usual self: I studied, I sat my exams, I scored straight A's lalala. Not that I'm not grateful for it. I'm a lucky girl, I know I am, so put aside your judgmental glasses for awhile kthx.

And then when I came here, I really started to grow younger. I'm rediscovering my lost youth. Painting the town red, blue, green, purple. I never painted towns any damn colour. It's been fun, really. I'm not the same person I was when I left GIS for this country. I'm probably not the same person I was yesterday, or the day before. Humans weren't meant to remain static; we're 66.6% fluid and hence fluid we should be.

But I know I'll always carry that cargo-pants-wearing-all-black-shirted kid with me. She's not that bad. Really.

Nothing beats the thrill of opening packages in the morning after routine Combat and Pump classes. I have an unhealthy obsession with polka dots, leopard print and 4 shot Americanos which have been fulfilled in the past couple of days. I am immediately a happier camper after.

...because i AM that narcissistic :)

and also because it's a Metallica song that I've been looping. It's about time something changed anyway.

I go through phases in my life where I want/need different things done to myself. Why? For shits and giggles, d'oh. I don't ever want to wake up when I'm fifty five and discreetly Botoxed and look at myself in the mirror and say "Shit, I shoulda, coulda, woulda done x, y and z".

X, y and z hopefully not being people.

Last term, I pierced the rook of my ear (wiki it if you want to know) because I woke up one morning and decided I needed another piercing so I took the 27 to Camden and had it done. The damn thing gets infected off and on, but I don't have any regrets. I also have a large ring threaded through the cartilage of my left ear - my orbital piercing. Was my first not-normal piercing last year. I haven't got as many piercings as Ms Moss, but I think this I-want-pain phase might be kicking in again soon. Hah, as if studying isn't painful enough.

And for kicks:

My life these days can pretty much be summed up in the words of James Hetfield:

Seek. And. Destroy.

Okay, maybe not.

I'm just seeking to destroy my bank account by perpetually going on eBay instead of burying my nose in the books. But whatever, I like that song. Been looping it 24/7.

Also have been on frantic search for these shoes. Why, you ask? If you're looking to shut me up, then you can ask me why I want these shoes because I have no answer. I shall just ask you to look at them.

They sort of have an ethereal quality about them, don't they? It screams "WALK ME DOWN THE STREET LIKE A FUCKING SIZE ZERO MODEL". They begged to be worn and loved. Sob.

Mrm. I cannot believe she has it in three colours. Goddamn.

I walked into a 2nd hand bookshop today. It felt oddly familiar yet foreign. I shall post about more substantial issues when I'm not meant to be procrastinating.

What i'd do to have all the free time in the world to bask in the sunshine and read intense novels all day. I should stop listening to music for a while and take in the sounds of the natural world. It's the most fucking depressing thing in the world to have to stay indoors while the sun is shining outside. My wardrobe and camera call to me, but I cannot answer their desperate pleas. Sad, but true.

I know though that in a hazy whirlwind of black coffee, candy and countless purchases of clothing (I had to pay homage to AA and Urban Outfitters this morning) in the next six weeks, this will all be over. Then Paris. Hungary. Project work. Morocco. I'm going home on the 30th of June.

And that's it, London. Sayonara. I'll probably miss you, but I'll be off to the country I've read and seen so much of.

San Diego, California, US of A

- God willing.

Went on a two and a half day whirlwind tour of Barcelona, just because it's an absolute tourist trap that everyone must see.

Highlights and lowlights:

- We were robbed of 50 euros before our very eyes by a cruel woman who thought she could gladly take advantage of three Asian girls travelling by themselves.

"You give me no 50, no 50!"
"For fuck's sake, we just GAVE you a 50 euro bill!"
"No 50, no 50!"

The protest goes on for a while until a girl in a Foo Fighters sweater snidely says "Go back to Singapore!", to which we replied, "Fuck you, we're not from Singapore! Damn bitch." I don't understand people who say "Go back to *insert respective Asian country here*". HOW do you bring yourself to say such things without feeling slightly guilty? I blame the parents. I do.

And just like that we had to cough up an extra 21 euros for the bus ride from Girona (the airport) to Barcelona because she took MY 50 and said I didn't give her any money. Not to say we weren't told to be careful because almost everyone who goes to Barcelona has some sort of theft/loss story to tell.

- Food was so-so. Paella was a disappointment. I've had better at La Bodega back home, sad to say. Churros, however, never fails. Patatas fritas, too, never ever fails. Oh, how I long for the glorious taste of the spicy saltiness of a carefully cubed deep fried potato that's been lightly smothered in garlic mayonnaise to be etched permanently on my tongue :(

- Camwhoring at Park Guell.

- The weather was fucking miserable. Kept pissing rain - like how it does in London.

- Buying 18 cents water.

- Lusting over the new S/S 09 Zara blazers. They had every colour of the rainbow!! I clapped my hands in glee when I saw them and drew some strange looks, but alas..there was no time to queue. C'est la vie. You can never have too many blazers.

Just been through one of those days. Feel like flopping on my bed and doing absolutely nothing but sifting through a intellectually debilitating fashion magazine that will fry my neurons so much so that I will just go to sleep immediately. It's getting cold again. FFS. It was a nice day yesterday, enough to go tramping up and down Oxford St in an electric blue micro-mini skirt sans tights and my precious 5 inch ASOS heels.

No work has been done tonight. Boo me. Have instead uncanned even greater desire for material things as an expensive but effective way to distract self from exponentially dwindling intelligence levels as I look upon my signal processing notes with a great sigh.

Now.

At the risk of sounding like a total and utter bimbs.....ah, what the fuck. I'm just a regular fashion victim! Where lah is my fairy godmother who will bring me all these goodies? (Notice how I didn't say Prince Charming as a sign of devotion to my independent feminist ideals mwahah)

Oh, what's a girl to do with herself in times of stress?

I'll tell you!

- karla's closet and that's chic...probably any fashion blog will do
- Reese's Pieces/Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and Hummingbird cupcakes (red velvet isn't that hot, seriously. vanilla >> red velvet any day)
- tom yum soup with chicken and broccoli.
- nail polish


- kopi-o/Americano. PLENTY of this stuff is good for you =)


fuckity fuck fuck shit. 379847594ksdjfoisd.

You know you're in trouble when you dreams entail buying Prada bags and platform shoes adorned with red soles and Chinese characters, and then the first thing that you do in the morning is make yourself a cup of coffee and log on to the Internet to find look at that pair of insane Balenciaga booties just to whittle your sense of being into a comfort zone because you know that, in reality, you'll never be able to afford it :(

Amid the loud, loud headbanging (hurray for old school '90s grunge) music playing in the background and my Artificial Intelligence coursework (I curse the day Prolog was invented) just lurking somewhere on my desktop, I thought I'd compile a list of a few things that add a little sparkle to my otherwise mundane life. These things that may not make me smile or laugh or show any outward emotion whatsoever, but they do elicit a nascent feeling of unadulterated warmth and satiation after. The concept is simple, really.

Not in any particular order.

- my grandparents
- listening to my song of the moment on repeat for 24 hours straight
- sipping on sugarless black coffee in the morning
- sun rays glimmering through a section of cloud in the evening sky before sunset
- nice texts from people you haven't heard from in a while
- nice texts
- late night conversations that seem to go on forever
- eating a very simple lunch with my family at home on a regular weekday
- being able to string together a sentence with English, Malay, Hokkien and Mandarin thrown in. sometimes even Cantonese.
- when a song I really like comes on radio (back home, that is)
- the smell of freshly baked bread wafting from a bakery
- the sight of iced cupcakes
- the knowledge that i've cleaned up and settled everything for the day so i can retire to bed peacefully
- watching my muffins rise in the oven
- buying cheap cocktail rings that engulf my fingers
- after running for two hours, i still am not panting my guts out. (but sadly, i reckon this is no longer the case)
- vacuuming
- rearranging my wardrobe
- getting a much needed hug
- cracking my knuckles until they pop
- stumbling upon a piece of inexpensive clothing or jewellery that you know you must have
- mosh pits
- getting up from the hairdresser's chair after five hours and then proceeding to admire newly blow dried hair
- brie cheese and crackers
- not fucking up my nails when i paint them
- handwritten letters
- adorning my entire wrist with ridiculous gewgaws

My hair is blue- and red-striped. Always been a sucker for hair dye. But I've been told I look like a Barcelona FC fan and my hair vaguely resembles the French flag/Malaysian flag without the yellow.

Ahluvvet.

Even though Amazon sells books for pretty darn cheap and offers free delivery, I'd still rather buy used books; the total price for used books including shipping totals up to more than buying it straight from Amazon. I adore poring through slightly yellowed paper knowing that somewhere someone else has shared the same emotions that I am about to experience while reading the same novel. I think it binds humanity in an odd sort of way.